


Black and White

by SpitfireUSN



Series: Stoic Walls [1]
Category: Call of Duty
Genre: Anthony(OC), Color Blindness, Doc(OC), child abuse tw, drug/alcohol abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-21
Updated: 2015-09-29
Packaged: 2018-04-22 18:05:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4845188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpitfireUSN/pseuds/SpitfireUSN
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Archer can’t risk injury, can’t risk being sent home to his only family, his father, for med-leave. Toad doesn’t want it anymore than Archer does. But when it inevitably happens and Archer is wounded on a mission and is being forced on a medical leave, old memories are stirred up and nobody wants a repeat of the past.<br/>( Please Note that Rape/Non-con is only very briefly hinted in the first chapter and is not mentioned again)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is set before any of my cannon Archer/Toad fics like Stoic, it's a sort of prequel. I thought I’d give you guys a little ‘back-ground’ on the relationship when they were like brothers and a lot more insight on Archer’s back-story. The plot line to this was just a bit of a random thought I had that I started thinking about and figured that it’d make for a nice explanation and such and I decided I’d post it, so here you go. (Note that this is the only chapter that mentions the rape/non-con and it does not go into detail, it is only hinted.)  
> Thanks for Reading, Fly High Aim Higher  
> ~Spitfire out

Archer sat down on the edge of the bed with a sigh. Toad sat down next to him quietly  and put an arm around him.

“Archer…”

“You remember those days in secondary when I’d show up with rope burns on my wrists and all those bruises?” Archer asked without looking at him, “And when you’d try to ask I’d always deflect the question and keep you off of it…”

Toad was quiet for a minute, “Yeah… Archer… What was that?”

Archer took a breath and turned away, “Well, you know how my dad blamed me for mum’s death…” Archer hesitated, this was the one thing Toad didn’t know about him, what his dad did, sure he knew about the beatings and everything but _this_ , this was different.

“Archer, I already don’t want you going back if you’re going to be stuck with _him_ for two weeks, and I’m sure you don’t want to go either, what’s one more reason?” Toad persisted.

Archer shook his head, “I don’t know, I just…” he sighed, “You know what things were like when I was a kid, how my dad used to blame me for mum’s death, something I can’t help and rather despise nonetheless… Only… You don’t know, not the worst of it… I didn’t want you or your folks worrying about me even more.”

“What if I took my leave and you came with me, you know my parents love you, it’s almost like we’re actual brothers, not just really good friends,” Toad suggested.

Archer shook his head, “Doesn’t work like that, Toad, I have to go to family, and he’s the only _family_ I have left…”

“Then tell MacTavish! Archer, you can’t go back there! You’ll end up worse than when you left!” Toad was firm in his decision, and when Archer didn’t speak, he did, “… At least tell me what you’ve been leaving out… please?”

Archer sighed, “I can’t tell him Toad, I don’t want to risk discharge for mental issues that don’t exist, you know how the military is, if they knew something like this they’d over-react… and as for what I’ve left out…” Archer took a deep breath, “The old man and his drinking buddies liked to gang up on me from time to time, expected me to fight back and win. And when I couldn’t do it… He’d tie me down, blindfold me so I couldn’t see what they were doing and… well, you can guess the rest…” he explained quietly.

Toad got the message and was shocked, “Archer… No, I’m not letting you go back to that filth! There has to be something we can..”

“No, Toad, there isn’t,” Archer cut him off, “He’s the only family I have left and I wish he didn’t even exist. Look, I’ll keep my cell on me at all times, if you call, the only way I won’t answer is if something happened, okay?”

Toad bit his lip but nodded, it was better than nothing, “Okay… But please, if he tries to do something, at least try to fight back?”

Archer nodded in response, “I will, Toad, you know I will. Now, I’ve got to go see Doc before I go, and we all know how Doc is about injuries.”

Toad hummed in response, not oblivious to the obvious topic change, “Yeah, he’s very meticulous with them… Damn good thing to, almost lost you.”

Archer chuckled, “Don’t you think you might be exaggerating just a bit?”

“No…” Toad stated bluntly, “Come on! That sniper got you in the gut! And even with Doc hanging over you like a damn shadow you were out for a good week afterwards.”

Archer chuckled at his spotter’s reaction and shrugged, “Well, it’s not like I remember most of what happened anyway,” he admitted.

“That too…. Wait, what? You don’t even remember what happened?” Toad questioned in shock.

Archer laughed lightly at his partner, “Last thing I remember was shouldering my rifle when I heard something,” he shrugged.

“Guess it’s my turn to tell a story then…” Toad shrugged, “You heard something that I didn’t apparently, you shouldered your rifle and I didn’t have a damn clue what you were doing, we kept walking a couple steps, stop, you scanned, then out of nowhere there was a bang and I saw you jerk out of the corner of my eye, when I faced you, you were starting to cough up blood and there was a scarlet stain spreading over your gut… then you just dropped and I almost panicked, but I managed to keep myself calm long enough to take out the enemy sniper,” he explained, “Then MacTavish called in asking for a sit rep and when I answered, well, I had a bit of explaining to do but I basically told him what happened and he sent CASEVAC in to get us out.”

“Did we finish the mission?” Archer asked.

“Yeah, you were hit on the way to the LZ,” Toad answered with a brief chuckle at what his partner was worried about.

Of course Archer wouldn’t be worried about himself, he’d been through too much to be worried about himself; he just wanted to make sure others made it through and were okay.

Archer nodded, “Good, as long as we got the job done… I can handle my dad…”

The next day found Archer outside the door to his old home, which he spent little time at after meeting Toad. This only served to make things worse between him and his father though. Archer thought about turning around and finding a hotel or something but before he could, the door opened to reveal his father, drunken, unshaved, and fat.

“Who are you and what do you want?” he demanded, his voice slurring in his drunken state.

“I don’t want to be here anymore than you want me here, trust me…” Archer said sourly.

“ _Ian_?!” his father seemed to wake up, “Thought I told you not to come back…”

“Afraid I don’t have a choice, I’m being forced on medical leave…” Archer explained, “You try anything and you’ll have a good portion of my squad on your ass,” he added, holding up his cell phone, “Anything happens, well, the Doc’s rather paranoid about the injured, they’ll find out.”

Anthony Richards scowled and motioned for Ian to enter the house. The house was disgusting, beer cans and other rather… questionable, substances littered the floors, tables, and the single, dirty couch. The door closed behind him and Archer heard his father walking up behind him.

He turned around in time to be slugged in the jaw but blocked the other hit, “Don’t,” he said simply, not phased at all by the punch, “I can fight better than you can now… Especially when you’re drunk…”

Anthony stepped back and looked Ian over; he appeared to be sizing him up. Archer just looked at him evenly, not saying anything. His father grumbled and trudged off, Archer watched him go. He shook his head and made his way to his old room. He didn’t want to be here, he wanted to be anywhere _but_ here. Archer had joined the military under the pretense of getting away from his father and Toad had coincidentally followed him in after his parents had decided to stay permanently in Braintree after finding out about his and Archer’s friendship, they had been on vacation there or something and Toad ended up having to go to school there while they were on said vacation, which is where the two met under somewhat ironic circumstances.

He let out a breath and set his bag down, thinking that he ought to call Toad. Archer fished his phone out of his pocket and called his friend.

“Archer?” Toad’s voice immediately came through the other end, making Archer chuckle, “You okay? You make it there?”

Archer laughed, “Yeah, Toad, I’m good. Just wanted to let you know I made it, mate.”

“That bastard didn’t try anything did he?”

“Toad, come on, what did I tell you? I’ll be fine, even if he does try something.”

“I know, I know, I just can’t help but worry, with the shit you’ve been through because of him…. I don’t know about this Ian, I keep feeling like you’re just going to end up worse than when you left,” Toad admitted.

“I know Chris, but I’ll be fine, I can fight better than he can now, you know that.”

“Believe me, I know,” Toad answered crossly, “You’ve proved it to me plenty times, Arch…”

“Oh hush,” Archer said with a brief chuckle, “Ugh, this house _reeks_ of drugs and shite…” he muttered, holding the phone with his shoulder as he picked up an old frame off the floor.

His breath caught in his throat when he saw it. The glass was broken but the picture inside the frame was in a fair condition. It was a picture of him, his mother, and his father a few days after he was born.

“Archer? You okay?” Toad asked after a few seconds of silence.

“Y-yeah,” Archer answered quietly, his voice tight, “I just…. I found an old photo… I gotta go, Toad, I’ll talk to you later…”

“Okay… bye Arch.”

Archer hung up the phone and let it fall back in his pocket as he stared at the picture he held. His mother had been killed when he was no older than five, and he’d been forced to watch it happen. Archer hadn’t even known that there were any pictures of her.

He could tell his dad was in the doorway, he didn’t need to see or hear him, he could smell the drugs and alcohol on the man. Archer didn’t bother turning to face him.

“So, how in the bloody fuckin’ hell does someone like _you_ become a sniper then?” Anthony asked roughly.

Archer grunted ambiguously, _this_ again, “With a spotter,” he answered bluntly.

“Well obviously this _spotter_ isn’t good enough…”

“Hell of a lot better than you,” Archer shrugged, “Wasn’t his fault, neither of us noticed till it was too late,” Archer didn’t know why he was even trying to hold a conversation with this man.

Archer set the photo he was holding down on the beat up dresser as he heard his father coming up behind him. Ian turned to face Anthony and stared the man down.

“How does someone like you live with himself?” Archer asked bluntly, “Knowing everything you’ve done, how it was all meant to hurt people. How, the fuck, do you live with yourself?”

Anthony hardened his glare and lunged towards Ian, he’d had enough of his son’s big talk and accusing looks, he drove his fist into Ian’s gut.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know it hasn't been a week yet, but I just wanted to go ahead and post the next chapter :P Enjoy!

Ian felt immense pain surge from his gut where he’d been shot. He grimaced and doubled over, wrapping an arm around his abdomen.

“Still weak as ever…” Anthony muttered upon seeing Archer’s reaction to being hit, unaware of the bullet wound where he’d hit him.

Archer coughed, trying to reply but found that he was unable. He lifted his shirt off, hoping to get a better breath as he coughed and spluttered. Ian saw the dark stain spreading across the pale wrap around his injury and instantly knew that the wound had been reopened.

“Fuck…” he cursed; his voice was tight with pain.

Anthony shoved Ian backwards. He tripped over his bag and landed harshly on the ground with a grunt of pain. He was mounted and punched repeatedly in the face. Anthony didn’t give Ian a chance to recover from the blow to his gut and didn’t relent in the beating. Not until the body under him stopped struggling.

“Still pathetic…” Anthony muttered, Ian’s face was bloodied and the wrap around his middle was soaked in red.

Back at the base Toad had just tried for the tenth time to call Archer with no answer. He threw the phone into his pocket and ran out. He had never known Archer to break a promise and there was nothing that wouldn’t wake him up if he were asleep. He had to go, had to make sure Archer was safe. They were brothers; they had each other’s backs.

He hurried to the rec room where the Captain and Ghost were watching a game and debating which team would win.

“Toad, you look flustered, something wrong?” MacTavish asked when he saw Toad.

“I’ve tried to call Archer ten times now, no answer. He told me the only way he wouldn’t answer would be if something happened,” He answered quickly, checking his phone again.

“And what makes you think something might have happened?” Ghost asked in return.

Toad was silent, debating telling them about Archer’s dad, he quickly decided at this point that he had to tell someone, he sighed, “Long story short, there’s a good chance he’ll end up worse than when he left, his dad isn’t exactly the ‘ _nicest’_ person out there.”

The two officers just looked at Toad, “What are you talking about?”

“Look, now is not the best time to discuss this, we’ve got to get Archer out of there soon,” Toad said quickly.

Archer woke up several hours later, after the sun had set, feeling sore and weak. He groaned, he might’ve been used to waking up like this but it didn’t stop it from hurting so damn much. He reached into his pocket, going for his phone, figuring he should keep to his promise and call Toad. His phone was gone, of course it was… Toad knew something like this would happen, he should’ve listened. Now, every movement he made sent a rippling pain through his gut, he needed Doc to take a look at it but he was nowhere near being close by. Archer would just have to suffer through it.

Anthony stood in the door way, looking at the screen of a phone, _Ian’s_ phone. He tossed the device to the sniper; it landed face up next to him. Archer pushed himself up; knowing if he let out the pained groan he was holding back, things would only get worse. He picked up the phone and looked at the screen.

Toad had tried to call him… ten times…

_‘Shit… How long was I out?’_ he questioned himself silently, it had only felt like a few hours. The number of missed calls, however, made him believe otherwise.

Archer quickly debated with himself whether he should call his friend or not. He’d promised that the only way he wouldn’t answer is if something had happened, and something did happen. Toad would freak out either way. Archer knew if he called Toad he wouldn’t be able to keep it out of his voice, not for long. He put the phone in his pocket, deciding to leave the calls unanswered.

Ian pulled himself up using the dresser to help support him when pain ripped through his abdomen. Maybe he was a bit worse than he originally thought as well… His eyes locked on the photo of him, his mum, and his father. They were all smiling and happy; of course, Ian was just a baby in the picture. It was five years before his mother was killed. Ian knew who was responsible for his mum’s death. He’d never forgive the man; his life had been made a living hell because his dad blamed him. The murder had been made to look like suicide and Ian had been forced to watch it happen.

“Why couldn’t we have just stayed like this?” Ian questioned no one in particular, picking up the picture and looking at it sadly.

“Because…” his father’s voice cut through the terse silence, “ _that_ life is for people that are actually _worth_ something…”

Ian was used to this kind of berating from Anthony. He rolled his eyes to himself and looked up at his father.

“Yeah, I’d like to see you beat me in a _fair_ fight for once…” Ian muttered, smirking at the memories of him and Toad sparring, Ian always coming out on top.

“Yeah well _life_ isn’t fair, Ian,” Anthony retorted harshly, “Not to _me_ , not to your _mother_ , _not to anyone_!”

“Don’t you _dare_ bring mum into this!” Archer snapped, “You know _damn_ bloody fucking well how she died and you know just as well it’s _not_ because of me!”

Anthony hardened his glare and stormed towards Archer. Ian reacted quickly, swinging his fist full forced into his father’s jaw, knocking the man back several steps.

“You want me to fight back and win?! Fine, but you’d damn well be careful what you wish for,” Archer spat, standing his ground as Anthony approached him again.

The pain in his gut was forgotten in his rage as Archer swung underneath a right hook and made a jab into Anthony’s diaphragm. The hit shorted the older man of breath as the younger stood straight and used the momentum to swing his knee up into the man’s chest and his elbow was swung back down across Anthony’s back.

Anthony spun and grabbed Archer around the neck as he fell, twisting his body so that he landed on top of Ian. He put all his weight into holding Archer’s middle down and all his strength into the punches aimed for Archer’s face.

Archer twisted and struggled, tried to use his lithe form to outmaneuver his father and get the upper hand but it was impossible with the wound in his gut. The injury was still bleeding and the blood was starting to seep through the bandages and into his shirt.

He was barely lucid when he heard the front door of the house being kicked in, but Anthony was too occupied to notice the arrival of several other men into the home.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so it looks like I'll be posting a new chapter every other day because I'm impatient :P So here ya go!

Toad had managed to convince MacTavish and Ghost that they needed to at least go check on Archer. The sniper put together a team of four people, he knew what was going on even if the Captain and Lieutenant wouldn’t believe him, but it wasn’t his place to tell them what Archer’s father had done, his friend had gone through so much trouble to make sure no one found out, it would be wrong of him to tell them without asking Archer.

His team consisted of himself, Roach, Royce, and Doc, since Jayhawk was out on a job and wouldn’t be back for a couple of weeks. Doc had never held a weapon with the intention of using it; he was a pacifist, a civilian doctor hired as the on-base doctor. He had access to files that the others didn’t: medical histories and such. He’d figured out the pattern, put together all the pieces, he knew what Archer’s father did to him, so when Toad offered him a pistol, saying it was ‘just in case’ he accepted it, he wasn’t going to let this go unanswered and there was nothing stopping Archer’s father from turning a firearm on them.

Toad gave him a brief explanation on getting accurate shots and how to hold the firearm before they left in a van that had blacked out windows. Royce was driving, Toad sitting beside him giving directions while Roach and Doc sat in the back. Doc looked up front, able to see Toad’s face in the rear-view mirror. His face was hard, angry, and his eyes had a determined shine to them. Doc knew how to read people, and he could tell that Toad probably knew a bit more than he did about Archer’s childhood injuries at the hands of his father.

When they pulled up to the house, they quickly filed out of the van with practiced precision and stacked up on the door. Toad tried the knob but it was locked. He scowled and stood in front of the door and kicked it in quickly, the lock giving in easily.

The inside of the house stunk of all kinds of alcohols and illegal drugs. Doc grimaced at the smell and held the back of his hand to his nose to filter out the smell. Toad didn’t seem bothered as he walked off, pistol raised and ready, signaling for Doc to check the hallway to his left and for the other two to check the one to the right.

Doc stalked down the hallway, he was definitely out of his element. He was comfortable in infirmaries and operating rooms, not sneaking down hallways of people’s houses, for whatever reason. All of that was forgotten, though, as he heard something hit a wall and a grunt like someone had the air forced out of their lungs. He held the pistol carefully in front of him, rounding the corner into the room where he’d heard the noise come from. He was sure his hands would be shaking but his hands never shook, he was almost sure that his hands were incapable of shaking, but there were a hundred reasons that wasn’t possible.

He froze when he saw what was in the room. Archer lay motionless on a mattress on the floor, back against the wall it was pressed against. His face was bloody and bruised. A taller man stood over him, scowling, aiming something at him. It quickly clicked, Archer’s father was about to shoot him.

“So mum just didn’t cut it huh? Couldn’t just stop there, now you’re gonna finish the job? I fuckin’ dare you,” Archer said, his voice strained, “Pull the trigger coward, do it.”

“Hey!” Doc got the older man’s attention the best way he knew how.

Anthony looked up at Doc and back down at Archer. Archer glared at his father, shifting and forcing himself up to sit against the wall. Anthony stepped back from Archer, keeping the weapon trained on his son and keeping Doc in his sight.

“Who the hell are you?” He questioned.

Doc looked at Archer out of the corner of his eye, blood was starting to seep past his lips and now Doc could see the large red stain in the shirt he wore. Doc looked back up at Anthony.

He kept quiet; he didn’t know what he ought to say in a situation like this. Anthony shrugged and pulled the trigger.

Archer let out a scream of pain as the bullet pierced his right shoulder.

“No!” Doc heard himself yell for no particular reason.

He reacted on instinct, his fingers tightened around the pistol, pulling off a shot that bored into the chest of Anthony Richards.

He stared in shock. Not only had he just _shot_ someone, but his hands were shaking. Doc’s mind caught up with him and registered what he’d just done. He stared at the pistol in his hands and tossed it down as if he were afraid of it.

The state of mental shock was pushed to the back of his mind when he heard Archer cough. He looked over at the wounded sniper to see him struggling to stay awake. Doc knelt down beside him and looked at the fresh wound in his shoulder.

“You’ve got to stay awake, Archer,” he urged, “You’re okay; just don’t close your eyes.”

“Doc,” Archer said, his voice rough, “The hell, are you doing here?”

At that moment Toad ran in, pistol raised but lowered once he saw Archer.

“Someone had a hunch,” Doc said with a smirk.


	4. Chapter 4

They had laid down the back seats of the van to lay Archer in the back. Toad and Doc sat with him while Royce and Roach sat in the front seats. Toad pulled Archer’s head into his lap; Archer was having trouble breathing, but Doc insisted that he’d be fine. It didn’t stop Toad from worrying about his friend.

Archer had passed out shortly after getting situated. Doc had tried to wake him up but it was a no go, he wasn’t waking up soon. Toad looked up at Doc; he was watching Archer’s face.

Suddenly, Archer wasn’t in the back of a van anymore, he was five, sitting in a corner trying to disappear in fear, his dad was being crazy and hitting him and his mum. His dad had been drinking something that smelled bad. He started yelling something about Ian being a disappointment, a mistake. Ian didn’t know what had brought up this sudden rage in his father. He knew he couldn’t see like the other kids, other kids talked about reds, blues, greens, Ian had never seen these colors, he could only see black and white.

He felt pain all over his body.

Before he knew it he was back in the black van, looking back up at Toad. Archer groaned at the fact that he’d let himself fall asleep, always with the damn nightmarish memories. He attempted to sit up only to be stopped by two hands on his shoulders and one on his chest.

Three hands, one person… Archer looked to the side to see Doc sitting beside him, keeping careful watch of his injuries.

“You need to rest, Archer,” Doc said simply, “We’ll be back at the base before long.”

“ _No_ , no Doc, I can’t sleep,” Archer protested.

“I know, Archer, but you’re hurt, you need to rest, give yourself some time to recover,” Doc insisted, he’d seen how Archer’s eyes had been twitching, he’d been dreaming, and from his reaction, it was _not_ a pleasant dream.

“Hang on a minute Doc; I need to talk to him,” Toad put in, “Alone, if it’s possible…” he added as an afterthought.

Doc looked between the two for a second, “Alright,” he consented, “Make it quick,” he said simply, moving to sit closer to Roach and Royce to talk to them.

Toad looked back down at Archer once he saw that the medic was in conversation with the two other team members, “Why didn’t you fight back, Ian?” he asked seriously.

“I did,” Archer replied bluntly, “He got the upper hand when he got a hit on my gut, could hardly move after that, there wasn’t much ‘fighting back’ I could do,” he explained, shifting uncomfortably.

Toad nodded, understanding Archer’s reasoning, “Alright, but you know Doc’s right, you need to rest… Don’t worry, I’m right here, Arch, not gonna leave you.”

Archer smiled lightly, “Thanks, Chris,” he said quietly; his voice was rough from his trouble breathing.

At that moment Doc had finished updating Roach and Royce and moved to sit next to Archer again, “Archer…”

“I know, I know,” Ian stopped him, “rest,” he said bluntly.

He sighed and looked up at Toad again before letting his eyes slide closed so he could fall asleep once again.

Once again Ian was sucked into the dark realm of his sub consciousness as he was once again five years old. Anthony was yelling again, Ian didn’t understand most of what he was saying but from what he could pick out it was about his colorblindness. His father was calling him useless again. His mother, Andrea, was yelling back at him, defending her son. There was a smack and she fell on the floor in front of Ian, a red mark on her cheek, but Ian was too afraid to move and see if his mother was okay. Anthony stood in front of them, glaring down at them disapprovingly.

Ian shrunk back as his father reached for him; he was picked up by his hair. Ian whimpered at the pain but didn’t dare cry out. He was tossed around before being shoved down in a corner, tears streaming down his face as he screamed in fear and pain.

Archer jolted awake again, breathing heavily. He was still in the back of the van with his head in his friend’s lap but the other three missing.

“You okay?” Toad asked lightly.

Archer nodded faintly, realizing that the van had stopped, “Where are we?”

“Had to stop for gas, Doc and Roach went in to get supplies… You’ve been out for a couple hours now,” Toad explained simply, “How’re you feeling?”

Archer shifted a little, “Like I got hit by a bus…” he admitted.

There were three hits on the side of the van before the back door opened up and Roach and Doc loaded up, Royce climbing into the front seat.

“Hey,” Doc greeted quietly on seeing that Archer had woken up, he sat down by Archer’s side again, “You were doing an awful lot of shifting, everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Archer answered quickly, “I’m fine…”

Doc nodded silently and dug through his medical bag and pulled out a bottle of water. Toad eyed to bottle suspiciously, recognizing it as the one Doc had mixed some kind of medicine into. When he’d asked Doc about it he was told that it would help Archer sleep.

Doc passed the bottle to Toad, “Make sure he drinks at least half before he goes back to sleep,” he instructed.

Toad took the bottle and nodded, he didn’t like the idea of drugging Archer without him knowing but he knew Archer would be hesitant to sleep again, knowing the night terrors he had Christian wasn’t surprised by his friend’s reluctance. He did as the doctor had said and ensured that Archer had downed half of the bottle before putting the cap back on it and setting it aside. Toad could feel Archer’s body going slack as the drug took effect and dragged him into a deep sleep.

“Does he have these nightmares often?” Doc asked once he saw that Archer was out.

Toad looked up at him, “No, hardly ever actually… And when he does it’s usually really easy to wake him up…”

“Usually?”

Toad shrugged, “Every so often it’ll take a little bit more than a touch on the shoulder… I guess the worst of it was a long time ago, took me pinning him down and yelling his name to wake him up… but that’s only ever happened twice…”

In truth, Toad didn’t know why he was telling Doc all of this. He guessed he felt like Doc needed to know. Doc nodded carefully in response.

Ian opened his eyes. He was in the bathroom in his old home and he was five once again. _No, no, no, please, not this,_ his panicked thoughts raced through his mind, _anything but this…_ His father had tied something around Andrea’s neck. Ian was screaming, begging Anthony to stop, but he didn’t stop; he tied the other end of the thing around the shower head and swept her legs from underneath her.

“No! Please, stop!” Ian screamed, hot tears staining his cheeks as his father grabbed him and forced him to watch as she suffocated.

“Ian! Ian!” he heard a voice yelling at him but didn’t recognize it, “Wake up Damnit!” the voice yelled as he was met with a pain in his gut.

Archer woke up, wide eyed. His breath quick and heavy as someone yelled something to someone else, but he was too flustered to pay attention to who was saying what to whom.

“Archer, Archer calm down, or you are going to hyperventilate,” a calm voice struck his ears and a cold hand was pressed against his jaw, “Look at me, Archer; I need you to calm down.”

Archer managed to take control of his breathing, slowing it to controlled gasps for air, sounding like he’d just run ten miles with no break. He brought his eyes to focus on who was in front of him.

“D-Doc?” he stuttered, the doctor was holding him upright with a hand on his back.

He felt a presence beside him and looked over to see his partner sitting there, a worried look plastered on his face, “Ian? You okay?”

He nodded faintly, still recovering from the shock of his night terror. Chris put a hand on Ian’s shoulder.

“I’m here, brother, I’ve got your back,” he assured quietly, gripping the Brit’s left shoulder carefully.

Ian gave him a thankful look before pulling his American friend into a light hug, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to forget the nightmarish memories.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter :)

Archer hadn’t moved or said anything since waking up from the nightmare and Toad kept close to him. Archer had calmed since waking up but he still had a rather haunted look in his eye. It made Doc wonder what Archer had seen, what he had really been through. But asking right now was a bad idea, not because two people that didn’t know where there but because he was still in a form of shock, asking would only make things worse, Doc was sure.

Suddenly the van was screeching to a halt and Toad grabbed onto Archer to keep his injured partner from being jostled too much as Doc braced himself against the wall of the van.

“What the hell?!” Toad questioned, “Thought I told you guys to take the breaking easy!”

“Uh, Toad, you might want to see this one for yourself…” Royce said slowly, not taking his eyes off of the form standing in front of the van.

Toad let out an aggravated breath and moved to look out of the windshield to see what had made them stop so suddenly.

His eyes widened at the sight of Anthony Richards standing there with a pistol pointed at the glass pane separating him and the team, “ _Shit_ … Go! Go, go; get out of here, now!” he shouted in a panic, moving quickly to take up his spot next to Archer again.

“Hold on!” Royce warned, flooring the gas pedal and weaving around the man.

Toad wrapped an arm around the back of one of the front seats and used his other arm to hold Archer close to him, careful of his injuries. Doc grabbed hold of the side step bar to keep from being thrown around. It was of little benefit, though, as the van tipped, the sharp turn too much for the heavy vehicle. The van fell to Doc’s side and he was slammed into the wall nearest him.

 Toad locked his arm around the seat he was holding onto and held fast to Archer so that neither of them would fall on top of the doctor.

Doc moved out of the way and took hold of Archer to help lower him to the ground, “Everyone okay?” he asked, setting the sniper down carefully.

“I’m good,” Roach called from the front.

“I’m up,” Royce’s response was a dry groan.

“I’m up,” Toad echoed.

Archer simply nodded and stood up, having to crouch slightly inside of the vehicle. He tried to open the back doors, but, upon finding that they were jammed, kicked it open, only to see Anthony standing on the other side. His face hardened into a full on glare of pure hatred as he snatched Toad’s side arm from its holster.

He stepped from the van and marched towards his father, “You murder your wife, abuse you only son, go down in a spiral of drugs and alcohol, and all you have to show for it is being shot by a god damn pacifist, and now by your own son,” he spoke quickly, angrily, and leveled the pistol with Anthony’s chest before pulling the trigger, the bang punctuating the end of his little speech. 

“Arch…” Toad was stunned; Ian had grown up living in fear of his father, only to kill the man.

“Drop it, Chris,” Ian replied in a biting tone, “The filth had it coming.”

At that point Archer was walking back towards the van to see what could be salvaged; they’d need to get back to base somehow. Roach took that as a sign that it was time to call MacTavish and request a helicopter evac.

The chopper was there in a matter of hours and Toad and Doc explained the situation to MacTavish.

When they finished recounting the events of the day, MacTavish simply stared at Archer, who was standing a little ways off, leaning against the safety barrier of the road, and not looking at them. He would probably have to talk to him later, he showed absolutely no remorse for his now dead father. Archer didn’t shake, he hadn’t shown a single _twitch_ of hesitation in ending his father’s life, and it was worrisome.

There was no good in talking to him now, though, and they all boarded the helicopter in silence. Doc sat close to the cockpit, staring at his hands like he couldn’t believe he’d actually shot someone. Chris sat close to Ian at the back of the chopper, close to the bay door, and lent his friend a comforting presence. Ian didn’t react to it or to the comforting arm around his shoulder, except to lean into the body next to him. He would be okay physically, but he wasn’t sure about his mental status. Ian had worked so hard to push down the horrible memories, and he’d been doing well, but this had set him back so far that he wasn’t sure he could recover.

Chris wasn’t about to leave Archer’s side after what he had just been through. He’d do what they’d done in childhood, be there for each other. Chris didn’t know what to say, honestly there was really nothing that _could_ be properly said, but he would be there, he would be a shoulder to lean on for his brother.

Ian was thankful for his friend, more than he could say or express, so he simply leaned into the embrace and hid his face. He would be okay in time. Time was all he needed, time and his brother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Please let me know what you think!

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think in the form of a comment? It would be very much appreciated and I do reviewer shout-outs so you get something out of it too :)


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